Categories: France How To, Paris
If you've listened to my previous episodes on home exchange, you know I'm a fan. I've done it myself, I think it's a smart way to travel, and for France especially, it lets you live in a neighborhood instead of just visiting it. But in this episode, I share a conversation with Melanie Dixon, an American traveler who loves France and has done home exchange both as a guest and as a host — and we got into the part nobody talks about enough: what a home exchange bad experience actually looks like, and what you can do to avoid it.
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Melanie's Paris Problem
Melanie has stayed in two Paris apartments through home exchange. The first one? Great. It took her 43 outreach emails before someone said yes, which is exhausting, but once she was in, the place was clean, the hosts were lovely, and she had a wonderful two and a half weeks.
The second stay was a different story. She booked a week in the 15th arrondissement. There weren't many photos on the listing — and she says now that should have been her first clue. When she arrived, she found a rickety staircase, a hallway light that barely worked, mold in the bathroom, exposed wires, and what looked like a large studio that had been haphazardly divided into rooms. The host was friendly and checked in regularly, suggesting restaurants and making sure she was comfortable. But the apartment itself was not up to standard.
She left a three-star cleanliness review and wrote an honest, factual account of what she found. Within an hour of it going live, she got a not-so-friendly WhatsApp message from the host. That's the awkward part of home exchange reviews: you've given this person your phone number.
My Own Bad Experience
I've had four stays as a guest through home exchange, and one of them was a home exchange bad experience I won't forget. The place was grimy — not dirty in a way that a quick wipe-down fixes, but deep-down stained, neglected grimy. The kind of clean you need specific products and rubber gloves for. I tried. I gave up.
What really annoyed me, though, was that the listing said there was a washer and dryer. After two weeks of travel, I was counting on that. When I arrived, the host's welcome booklet said: please don't use the washer or dryer. They were the only modern appliances in the whole apartment. I ended up hand-washing things. I didn't complain directly to the host, but I did contact Home Exchange after the fact, sent photos, explained the situation — and they refunded the full amount. Their customer support was genuinely good. The apartment just wasn't.
Red Flags to Watch For
After this conversation, here is my running list of things that should make you pause before booking:
Few photos. If there are only two or three photos, move on. Someone who's serious about their listing shows you the bathroom, the kitchen, the bedroom, and the street. Scenic photos of Mont Saint-Michel don't tell me anything about whether the shower drains properly.
No mention of an elevator. In Paris especially, if the listing doesn't say there's a lift, there isn't one. They will not volunteer that information.
A four-star cleanliness rating. On home exchange, four stars for cleanliness really means two. People are polite. They don't want to slam someone's personal home. So read between the lines.
Lots of past stays, very few reviews. If a host has had 30 guests and three reviews, something is off. Most people feel obligated to leave a review. Silence usually means something.
Evasive answers to questions. If you ask a specific question and get a non-answer, that's information. A host who's proud of their place will just answer you.
No video call. Melanie's rule now is always do a video call before committing, whether you're the guest or the host. It's the single best way to get a feel for both the person and the space. Melanie is convinced that if she'd done a video call for that second Paris stay, she would have spotted the problem or the host would have declined, which would have been its own kind of answer. I generally don't do video calls before a HomeExchange, but Perhaps I should.
Is Home Exchange Still Worth It?
Yes, with caveats. It works best for stays of at least a week — the setup time for hosts is the same whether you're there two nights or ten, and the platform knows this. It requires more patience than Airbnb, more outreach, more decision-making on your part. You will get rejected, sometimes without explanation. But when you find a good match, you're staying in a real home in a real neighborhood, often for nothing more than the annual membership fee.
Go in picky. Skip the listings with thin photos and short descriptions. Don't be afraid to ask questions. And maybe do that video call. A home exchange bad experience is avoidable most of the time — you just have to be willing to walk away from the ones that don't add up.
If you found this useful, I publish a free weekly recap about France — practical information, episode updates, and things worth knowing before your trip. You can sign up at joinusinfrance.com/newsletter.
About Melanie Dixon
Melanie Dixon runs a full-service France travel planning business called Lavender & Steel. You can find her at lavenderandsteel.com.
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Tip Your Guides Extras Patreon Audio ToursIf you enjoyed this episode, you should also listen to related episode(s):
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TranscriptCategories: France How To, Paris